Salty or nah?

Picture this: You’re in a buffet line with some acquaintances. You’ve decided that you want fried chicken so you head in that direction. You eye the pan where the chicken is and you notice there are only a couple pieces left. Counting the people in front of you, you are not sure if there will be any left for you. So you wait and wait. When you make it to the front of the line, there is one piece left. You are a little disappointed, but you are grateful for the piece that you have. When you sit down at your table, a young lady passes by and is complaining about the fact that the buffet is out of fried chicken. She’s takes a look at your plate and her jealousy kicks in. She sits across the room from you and every now and then when you look up, you catch her “mean-mugging” you. She whispers to her friends and you know it’s about you. Her reaction to you (and your chicken that you waited patiently in line for) confuses you and you can’t understand why someone is so angry and mean when the chicken wasn’t theirs in the first place.

Interesting story huh? It’s crazy how one piece of chicken made that lady hate you and treat you so rudely. So let’s replace this fried chicken with a man. Aside from how you and the fried chicken met, everything about this story can ring true when it comes to a man. If you still haven’t grasped what I’m trying to say then I’ll say this: Why are these girls so salty towards you because of your man?

In this situation, I am a victim! My boyfriend of six and a half years is very attractive (to me at least). Now I must admit that I am the jealous, insecure girlfriend. Guilty as charged! I tend to overreact in certain situations, however, I can tell when another woman is “mean mugging” me and trying to be funny. Perfect example, There’s one young lady that I used to be acquaintances with. She was always very friendly and we would talk when I saw her. But after I had been dating my boyfriend, she started to roll her eyes at me when we would see each other. She would start whispering to her friends and they all would turn and look at me and roll their eyes too. Other people saw her reaction to me and started to ask questions. It even made me question my boyfriend. But I’ve come to realize that, for whatever reason, she is jealous.

I DEFINITELY cannot give advice on how to handle this situation because I still want to pull off my earrings and break out the Vaseline when it happens to me. But if you are the root of their jealousy, I can give you a few reasons why they may be jealous. 

1. They find your boyfriend/husband attractive and they want him for themselves. 

2. They are his side piece and they caught feelings. Now they are gunning for your spot. 

3. They are an ex or baby mama and can’t understand why he picked you and not them. 

4. Maybe it’s not just him. They know YOU are attractive and have it together and they want to be like you.

If you’re one of these mean mugging, eye rolling, bumping into her on purpose type of girls; then you need to know that your problem is because of your own insecurities. I feel sorry for you. I hope one day you can open your eyes and see you don’t need to express your envy in that way because it only makes you look 

bad.

To the girls being hated on, continue to do you and have confidence that you must be doing something right!

Golden Triangle Gospel Music Awards!!

I had the honor to be apart of this year's GTA Awards! I was nominated for Female Vocalist of the Year and my group Anointed Harmony was nominated for Female Quartet of the Year. In my opinion, it was a great show! Freddie Poindexter, who is the founder, really worked hard and had a great group of people backing him in this project! I look forward to participating again next year if the supporters of my ministry say the same. With that being said, the one thing I noticed is that local quartet groups were not very supportive of the awards and I heard on several occasions that it's not "real" This bothers me, that people would downplay anyone else receiving accolades mainly because they are not nominated. I even heard people say it was rigged. This is simply not true. Even though we did not win, I understood that the winner is based on votes and how many people support your ministry. It is a blessing just to be nominated, that means someone thought enough of you and your ministry that they thought you deserved recognition. So my advice for people who want to be apart of this next year, Get involved! Ask your supporters to nominate and vote for you and you will be walking the red carpet next year!


Here are some snap shots of my eventful weekend At the Golden Triangle Gospel Music awards.

Whitney- Friday Night at the Preshow

The Ladies with the Founder Freddie L. Poindexter

Me and my Brother for life!

ME in my convertible dress

Lani, me, and Lena!

Pearl!

My sisters on the red carpet!

Lani and her beautiful Mother!

Vee Sweets! Walking the red carpet!

So I missed blogging last week. I’m going to use this time to vent.

Scissors

There’s a popular saying going around that speaks of “cutting off” people. So that’s what I want to talk about. Everybody wants to say that they cut certain people off and their circle is small. Let’s think about this. . .  What does that say about your character? You now have less people in your life that you can depend on. Now even I have used this statement, but I never really thought about what it meant.

“Cutting off” someone is the act of ending friendships and relationships in your life. Sometimes we have to think about why these relationships ended. We are so quick to blame everyone else for our problems and we never want to take responsibility. It’s hard to admit when you are the one that was cut because of your actions.

The truth is, we have all talked about someone behind their backs. We have all neglected friends and family. We have all told lies for whatever reasons we felt like we had to. However, what makes the difference is, if you are called out on them, do you flee and tell more lies or are you real enough to tell the truth?

I have friends that I have been friends with since childhood. I have friends that I reconnected with over the years because I learned how to forgive and also ask for forgiveness. If you are expecting your friends to be perfect then the only true friend you’ll ever have is Jesus. Ladies, we are the worst offenders! We hold grudges and talk badly about our old friends simply because we think they hurt us. Let’s learn to keep our mouths closed because while you are speaking ill of your old friend, you are destroying your own character.

We all want to be loved. We were placed on this earth with other people to coexist. Being alone is not an option, eventually one day you are going to need someone. Just make sure that when that day comes, you haven’t handed them the scissors to cut you off. 

Hey, Let me get you a drink.

You look a little parched. You may be “thirsty” and I don’t mean that you need a drink. This day and age the word “thirst” does not mean what you think. Well actually, it does, but it’s more geared towards a person’s longing or desire for another person. It’s the approach that makes it a bad thing.

Normally, it was the male who was thirsty. I think about the old cartoons when a male saw an attractive female they started howling and salivating.  Now, women are just as thirsty, if not even more thirsty than the man. I think this post is personal to me because I see it every day. They think they are being discreet, but they are posting pictures on Instagram letting it all hang out. It’s not because they feel so good about their bodies, it’s because they need somebody else to say something about it to feel validated.

You see them. Every weekend, they are putting on their club clothes and posting it for the world to see. Oh, don’t let them get bored, then they post pictures of them laying in the bed with their breast hanging out. They go to work out and they post pictures of their “new” body in their workout clothes with their behind, so conveniently, poked out. Thirst has taken on the form of attention grabbing to cause a reaction out of a man. Truth is, If you had been yourself from the beginning, he would’ve probably still talked to you. If he didn’t, then he wasn’t there for the right reason anyway.

You put yourself out there in a way that only attracts those howling and salivating men and then complain that there are no “good” men around. You cannot blame a man’s reaction to what you give them. It’s his nature. I’m not saying it’s ok for a man to haggle you until you give him what he wants, I’m just saying you can’t get mad at his reaction to what YOU put out there.

Yeah, I see you ladies. All of you are beautiful in your own way. You don’t have to be naked to get attention. You don’t have to expose yourself to get a man. Your beauty within will shine anyway. You are worth a lot more than you accept. Sleeping with a man doesn’t mean you’re pretty, it means you have a vagina. Sex doesn’t validate anything. Inboxes and DM’s don’t make you a more desirable WIFE.  

Please don’t get caught up in the hype! Think for yourself and quench your thirst with self-love!

Everybody Loves a good list.

It’s true. I find myself spending hours looking through them on Facebook. So I decided to do a list this week.

5 Reasons you can’t keep a man.

1                  1. You talk too much.  

When in a relationship, we tend to vent and tell our Parents, family members, and friends about the problems in our relationship. It seems like a good idea at first, but then you wonder why after you and your mate “make up,” they feel differently about the relationship. You definitely can’t expect your parents to just put the disagreement or all the bad things you just had to say behind them. It’s best to find one or two people who will listen without judging. If you don’t have anyone keep it to yourself.

2. You listen to other people opinions.

Guess what? All of your friends don’t have your best interests at heart. Some of them want what you have. They will give you advice, but sometimes it’s not very good advice. They will tell you that they saw him with a girl, have you acting a fool, and then you find out she was his cousin. It’s best to think for yourself and you decide on your own what’s best.

3. You’re too clingy.

Believe it or not, he has a life outside of you. He has friends and hobbies that he likes to take part of that don’t involve you. Every aspect of his life should not include you. As well as every aspect of your life should not include him. If you have a hobby or something to do in your spare time, do it. Spend some time getting to know yourself.

4.You’re too controlling.

K. Michelle said “You can’t raise a man” so ladies please stop trying. At the end of the day, he’s going to do what he wants to do. No man wants another woman besides his mom telling him what to do.

5.You don’t listen.

How many times does he have to tell you the same thing over and over? You don’t have to yield to his every beck and call, however, if you want to keep him, you need to take heed to certain things that he says.

True enough, women possess some of these traits naturally. You’re always going commit one or two of these. However, you need to choose a struggle! If you do all five, then maybe you need to check yourself. 

Hello and welcome to Girl into Woman! At first I thought that I would Ghost write this blog and not let anyone know that it was me. However, I quickly changed my mind. I feel that part of being or transitioning into a woman is being real about who you really are. If I had to describe myself, I would say that I am an open book. I am a hard-working, loving, and stubborn individual, but to know me is to love me. I created this blog because I see so many girls performing the acts of women. But do they know what being a woman actually means? I’m here to bridge that gap. I want to talk about all things women! From Hair and makeup to relationships, you’ll find it all here!